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Writer's pictureSaad Manzoor

What is YOUR relationship with mental health?

Updated: Oct 1

Natalia Gomez Carlier Psychologist & Art Psychotherapist MAAT, ATR-BC


In May, we will talk a lot about mental health. It is, after all, Mental Health Month. Fortunately, mental health has started to enter our daily conversations. Many therapists and mental health workers will work diligently to help create more awareness and understanding of mental health. However, we sometimes speak about mental health without understanding what this abstract concept represents.

The word health comes from old English and is related to being whole or complete. When we talk about being healthy, it is about feeling whole, and complete, where nothing is missing. And then when we say mental, it is a reductive concept that incorporates our psychological, emotional, and social wellbeing. When we feel emotionally complete and socially whole, we are better able to handle stress, make choices, and relate to others. Our mental health can be seen in how we think, feel, and behave.

Mental health is more than not having a problem; it is more than not having anxiety, depression, or other mental disorders. Mental health is essential for our overall health. What we are looking for is a state of wellbeing. However, our individual mental health cannot be disconnected from our collective health. You are probably as tired as I am of discussing the impact of this pandemic and the state of our environment, but we cannot deny how it impacts us as human beings living on this earth. So, when considering our mental health, we must take a step beyond and think about our collective.

When discussing our mental health, it seems necessary to engage in a dance between the self and the collective. A dance between attending to my health, the health of the people around me, and the world at large. It is vital that we can name our emotions, own our actions, and be aware of our thoughts. Only then can we start to create collective solutions to support each other. And maybe we are not yet capable of coming up with solutions for the collective situation that we have created, but we must start by having conversations about our mental health.

The best way to prepare for this conversation is first to explore our experience and relationship with mental health. What is YOUR experience with mental health? Is this something that you are aware of? Is this something that you think about? Or is this something that stays in the dark corner of the last closet in your mind? Is this something that you don’t talk about?

Let’s try and exercise and flex our imagination muscles to help us understand a little bit more our relationship with mental health. Imagine that mental health is a person that you have just met. Take your time. What comes up comes up for you? Who is this person? Where did they come from? Are they young or old and frail? Are they rigid or spontaneous? Are they stable or ungrounded? What does this person have to say to you today? If you’re open and available, what would this person tell you that you need to do to take care of your mental health?

The most common answers might include:

  1. You need to learn to talk about your feelings and maintain a connection with supportive friends and family. Having someone who can listen is crucial to helping us feel connected.

  2. Regular exercise helps improve the way the body communicates, helps the processing of anger, and creates time for inner reflection.

  3. Pay attention to what you eat. In many ways, we are what we eat; our mental health depends on a complex balance of inner chemistry that functions when it receives the proper nutrients, the right ingredients to produce the dopamine, serotonin, and all the feel-good components that we need.

  4. Another message might be to take a break and prioritize your rest, renewal, and recovery. As was shared in our previous blog, we need to pay more attention to our sleep. In sleep and rest, we renew and repair our bodies so that we can take on more tasks the next day.

  5. And perhaps the most important message might be to learn to ask for help when you need it. This is maybe the most significant difference between mental health and physical health. When we fall and break a leg, have an unknown pain in our toe, or see spots in our skin, we often go to the doctor and ask if this is normal? And, what do I need to do? However, when it is about our feelings, thoughts, and behaviors, we are a little bit more hesitant to ask for help, and it is vital to ask the right person. As much as we can talk to our friends, we also need to ask an expert.

Nevertheless, I am most curious as to what YOU heard. Because what works for me might not work for you. It is time to turn in and see what the inner voice says.

My life has been engaged in helping de-stigmatize mental health, in helping talk about it in dinner conversations and awkward places. It is not easy to discuss as it confronts our vulnerabilities and fears, but it is essential. I would like to invite you all to talk about it. If you’re not ready to speak openly about it, you can start with your closest friends. If you are not yet prepared to talk, even writing about it can help clarify your biases and assumptions, knowledge, and ignorance around this topic.

Take some time today and ask yourself what makes YOU feel whole, and tomorrow start some conversations. Together we can make a difference in our individual and collective health.

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